Dr. Wendy Dearborne Choice Expert & Coach

Choice is the key to everything you want.   And it is the key to everything that has happened to you and is currently happening to you...and let's not forget, choice is the building blocks for everything that will ever happen to you.

It's common to feel a myriad of "intense" emotions when things happen that we don't like.  In fact, the same is true of the things that we find pleasurable.  Because of our hard wiring we  process life emotionally.  As a result of that our bodies respond by producing physiological effects that impact the autonomic nervous system.  These responses have to potential to build us up or destroy us; physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

The choices that we make create that myriad of intense emotions, so much so, that if things don't turn out the way in which we want, we ask ourselves as series of rhetorical questions, "why did this happen to me?  What did I ever do the deserve this?" The answer is simple you made a choice.  And that choice isn't a judgement or a belief or even an emotional response.  It's a choice. 

Our action/choice and subsequent  reactions is a fact.  The emotional connotation attached to the fact.choice is an purely emotional perspective.  What happens is that our emotional view point, our emotional out pouring is erroneously labeled a fact.

I feel it prudent to point out that choice has nothing to do with the  condoning of bad, illegal or criminal behavior.  Choice is simply a fact whatever connotations are attached to that fact are emotional responses and points of view.


I feel it prudent to point out that choice has nothing to do with the  condoning of bad, illegal or criminal behavior.  Choice is simply a fact whatever connotations are attached to that fact are emotional responses and points of view. 


Let's look at this in a little more detail. We'll use the following scenario to provide more distinction around the difference between fact and perspective/view point.

"Someone said something inappropriate to you and you got angry and  stormed out slamming the door as you left."  

• Fact: you were spoken to. 
  
• Fact:  you slammed the door. 
• Fact:  You left
  
• Fact:  You are entitle to feel and act in any way you choose.  

Emotional perspective/ view point: 

• View point: What was said was inappropriate.
• View point:  You became angry.
• View point:  You stormed out.
  
• View point:  Slamming the door made a statement for you.
  

When you ask yourself the questions or when you are asked the questions, "how did I get here?"  Why did this happen to me?"  You can say without condoning bad, illegal or criminal or heinous behavior, without  judgement, without assigning blame, without adorning a cloak  of shame, self loathing or victimization.   You can say,  "I got here based on my choices.  And I will get away from here and get to where I want to be based on my choices!"

By embracing and understanding the empowerment to be had invoking your inherent birth right, your soul right to make authentic choices, in the best interest of self, you will be able to create the life that you have dreamed of living.
 

Dr Wendy Dearborne  Choice Expert & Holistic Life Coach can be contacted
drwendy@itsmylifemychoice.com